It's been how long since I posted?
It's been how long since I posted?

Oh no!!!!



I don't know what it is with me lately. I wake up tired. I go to bed tired. I almost never even bother logging into my computer at home. My camera fills with images. I delete most. Post a few to Flickr. Think about journal entries. Put them off 'til "Later".

"Later" is a mythical place. It doesn't exist.


The age gap between Jake and Holly is really becoming pronounced. Up until last year while they differed in ability they were both still children in the sense that both remained tightly tied to their parents for planning activities. While we had tried to get Jake to start to spread his wings, he lacked the confidence to really strike out and explore the nieghbourhood solo. This year, as soon as the snow melted he was on his bike and away. I'm thrilled to see him take this step towards independance, but on the other hand that leaves Holly home alone without her playmate - and annoyed that her brother enjoys freedoms that she is not granted. She has therefore become far more demanding of our time when he is off.

And when he returns - friends in tow - she is an outsider looking in. Often times it works. Often times, it doesn't. Regular drama.

Our house seems to have become the neighbourhood flop-house for Jake and the gang, which is a double-edged sword. It is great to be able to get to know who he is hanging out with, but suddenly having five or six pre-teens taking over the basement on a Sunday afternoon has rather destroyed the notion of any tranquility on the weekends. They are good kids and generally well behaved, but still - damn but they can make noise.

And for Jake, having this sort of position within the group is a real esteem builder. The guy with the WII and the parents who will let us hang out and raid the fridge. So, we are all sorting out new boundaries on what level of autonomy he is permitted, what responsibilities go with it, and what portion of his schedule needs to be reserved for the family. His new best friend, Kyle, presents some difficult issues as well. He seems a good kid, although very rough around the edges. He lives with his father, and seems either largely unwelcome at home, or at least undesiring of being there. A latchkey kid at an age far too young for it.

It is tough to send a kid off who looks devastated every time he leaves, but there are still bedtimes, mealtimes, bath times, homework, and family time to fit into our own schedule too. Still, we do what we can to welcome him into our home while he is here, and to allow him to spend far longer visiting than we otherwise might.

Every kid needs a place that they feel safe and welcome - even if that place isn't their own home.

As for Jake, I'm not saying that he has been playing too much Zelda. I'm not saying that he hasn't.

Decide for yourself....